Any cure for a boyfriend that dont want me to have zebras

Shell231 · Post by **Shell231** » Sat Mar 12, 2005 10:32 am

We had a full blown arguement yesterday about them, lol just because i worked it out and it may cost me about £800 in total to collect fish and buy them he went mad anything out there for this ! like a whack on the head! lol please help me convince him

Rob · Post by **Rob** » Sat Mar 12, 2005 10:45 am

Hmmmm...how about a nice bottle of red, candles, and some tickets to see his footy team play!!! I find bribery..or blackmail will usually suffice. Althoughg I would say in the longterm bribery is a little bit more safe!!!!

Shell231 · Post by **Shell231** » Sat Mar 12, 2005 11:01 am

hehe! see the things is rob to get want i want i really have to pitch it to him like a sale! way up the pro's and con's so i did a little plan. i worked out were u lived roughly, i worked petrol cost and car hire lol then time plus cost of fish ( at a guess ) then asked him he said! " HOW MUCH! , that is a waste of money we could use that in far more useful ways! " so i then begain to beg........ and beg..........and beg! until it came embarassing, so i start to argue! then he wlked out! so bribery is the next option. Can anyone get any tivkets to see arsenal play at highbury! V.I.P box! thats his dream so i may have to get that

Adam · Post by **Adam** » Sat Mar 12, 2005 12:25 pm

Hi Shell,

Luckily the wifey loves the zebras but that doesn't mean it's been easy to convince her that I need so many. I am now on a life long zebra purchasing ban , beleive me it doesn't even compare to the Brazilian ban

.

My advice is not to get into arguments about it as you are less likely to get your way. Use your female charms, even turn the tears on if all else fails. Above all you must be prepared to compromise if you are to get the zebras. I've given up going out with my mates as much as I use to, it's killing me being stuck at home a lot more but the zebras make it worth while. I've started playing with the kids more and even do quite a bit of house work nowadays

. The thing that has really swung it in my favour is agreeing to redecorate the whole house. So you see you could get the zebras but it may mean you having to sacrifice some other things.

As luck would have it I have married into a family of Arsenal nuts. When you say VIP box I think you mean executive suite, this includes a sit down meal and the works but is obviously pricey. If you are serious let me know what game you want to see and my brother in-law will check to see what's available and for how much.

Shell231 · Post by **Shell231** » Sat Mar 12, 2005 12:51 pm

REALLY!!! wow! thanks adam! ill keep that in mind! cheers

Mindy · Post by **Mindy** » Sat Mar 12, 2005 2:01 pm

When I first mentioned getting Zebras, and the cost, my boyfriend went mad... He doesn't resent what I spend on my fish hobby as a whole, but at around £100 per fish (seems cheap now

) it was just silly. It was a totally extravagant suggestion, when there's other bills to pay, blah blah blah, and I could tell there wasn't much mileage in mentioning it again. And I left it for quite a while.

When the opportunity came for me to buy mine, I just didn't tell him. And so far, he's none the wiser.

However, I do know that at some point he will see them and he may or may not remember the conversation, but if he does, it's a fete accompli... And the world didn't end by me buying them, and the bills still got paid, etc. It's easier to argue in hindsight. Nothing he can do about it now.

And anyway... he's just decided to buy a £600 guitar amplifier. Just because he wants it. Not for a band or anything. So now I have all the ammo I need if he wants to criticise me for my fish! I suspect if you wait long enough, your boyfriend will want something extravagant and he'll expect his explanation of why he must have it to somehow seem different to yours! Just give it time...

Tom Kvitnes · Post by **Tom Kvitnes** » Sat Mar 12, 2005 5:11 pm

Dont tell them what it costs, thats the clue.

If i had told my wife that i have spent a month sallery on zebras, i am sure she had gone ballistic

She thinks it costs the same as any other tropical fish, and thats is how it should be

Regards

Tom

Tom2600 · Post by **Tom2600** » Sat Mar 12, 2005 9:09 pm

Hi Shell,

The best tactic with getting your own way is to take things gradually, OR lie!!

With the former option, just pick up the odd zebra here and there. I see a chap down south is again advertising on the
aquarist-classifieds website for £100 ono. This will also ensure you get a good mixed gene pool. If you were to pick up a group of F1s from someone any young would not be as strong genetically.

With option two, just say you have got some on the cheap or free. You must be able to syphon off some cash. A white lie never hurt anyone.

To be honest you are not going to get many zebras coming up for sale, and the ones in the shop are going for £150+ (unless anyone knows any different?)

I personally think Zebras will become available again in the future at a better price but it will be a few years. I bet a few other L nos will become expensive in the near future. Supply and demand etc. Suppliers are very clever at doing this.

Good luck

wandj · Post by **wandj** » Sun Mar 13, 2005 5:03 am

My boyfriend also does not care one bit about my hobby.
The only time he gives me attitude is over the clutter I sometimes leave behind.
He does not get on my case at all regarding the price of my fish or how many I have. He knows how much they are, how many I've lost, etc and I tell him because I know he won't say anything. He knows I'm always looking out for more too. Guess how I am able to keep away an arguement?

1 We make the same wage, but I make twice as much as he does due to the massive amount of overtime I log. I work an average of 72 hours a week. (And I refuse to cook on days when I'm working so we eat a lot of fast food)

2 I make the mortgage payment and paid for the renovations we've done on the house. I even helped him pay for his truck and his credit cards. He only needs to pay the utilities and groceries. He pays what he is able, but he can't compete with me.

3 I paid for our last 2 trips to the USA... I paid the airfare, hotel, etc.

So basically, I pay for my hobby and hugely support the house, so he has no right to complain....and he doesn't. I work so much though, he forgets how little time I have sometimes and does complain a little once in awhile about the "clutter" from my hobby.

So if you want to have peace and quiet, first, don't tell him how much they cost...he can't handle it.
And if he's worried about money, put on the pants in the house and out-wage him. Get a second job or whatever to show him it's YOUR money and it's not making the house suffer. And tell him to get a hobby of his own...one that he soley pays for I might add.

That's what keeps my house pretty quiet.

Shell231 · Post by **Shell231** » Sun Mar 13, 2005 5:25 pm

GOOD NEWS! he said yes! and he also agrees to everything else i want for them he will collect them and i even got him to pay half with me!! so it is all up to you now rob i am in with the fish! lol if i could put my name down for the second batch going for sale! lol cheers mate.

P.S I CANT WAIT!!!!!

:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D !!

Shell231 · Post by **Shell231** » Mon Mar 14, 2005 7:39 pm

lol no one seems to be sharing my excitement lol!

Rob · Post by **Rob** » Mon Mar 14, 2005 8:26 pm

Girl Power!!!!

Adam · Post by **Adam** » Tue Mar 15, 2005 11:40 am

That's great news Shell

,

So what did you say or do to win him over?

Tom2600 · Post by **Tom2600** » Wed Mar 16, 2005 12:15 am

Shell, are you really who you say you are?....I only ask because you must have worked some charm to get a turn around like that!

Shell231 · Post by **Shell231** » Wed Mar 16, 2005 6:34 pm

hehe! it was so much easier than i thought! i remebered one thing , he wanted to have the lads round for a footy night and i said i had a girly night in on the same night ( which i didn't i was just being difficult ) i said i would cancel my night if he let me have the plecs he said yes! ok! with out any more arguement, which i was total shocked about. I later find out from one of his mates, he was only winding me up to see how far i would go and bribe him, but they said he felt to guilty and couldn't carry on with it! lol so thats how i got him to say yes in the end. Crap story really but it worked in the end!

:D